Pssst…Rupert. Rupert Murdoch. Over here. You want to know what isn’t a recipe for long-term success in broadcasting? Expecting your core audience of hateful old farts to spend their way into immortality, or Viagra their way into permanent attention or relevance. Oh, we know that’s worked pretty well for you; we’ve all seen your hot, 1/3-age wife. And somehow, that seems appropriate for you. But the rest of the old farts…meh. They’re starting to run out of that reverse mortgage money, and those four-hour erections are starting to seem like a cruel joke when their hips they’re attached to prove softer than they.
Apparently, Fox’s ratings these days are looking about as soft as their viewership’s average bone density, and not even Bill O’Reilly’s interview with Obama was enough to offset that with its anticipated conservative boner density. While O’Reilly’s interview doubled Fox’s nightly viewership for about an hour, that was the only hour of the night that offered the network a reprieve from domination by MSNBC. Yes, the same MSNBC that a mere four months ago Fox claimed it was decimating in the ratings game.
Oh, how the mighty have fallen and broken a hip. Assuming they were ever actually up; even at the time, MSNBC’s president was calling BS on Fox’s unnatural and obviously artificial “ratings spike.”
Almost immediately after O’Reilly moment in the sun, MSNBC recaptured the ratings with its continuing coverage of an actual, non-manufactured scandal — RE: Exposing Chris Christie’s ongoing corruption. Rachael Maddow beat Fox’s only chance at holding the attention of the Viagra demographic, Megyn Kelly, by 100,000-plus viewers. And what did that all come down to? She got the coveted 25 to 54 year-old demographic — you know, the people who don’t need blue pills, fake outrage or a mindless, overly sexualized obsession with mascara or peroxide to look at a television “news” program.
(Megyn Kelly…totally not just conservative sex-bait.)
Psst…Rupert: Bad news, good news situation for you here. Bad news is that nobody thought CNN’s news empire could fall, until its ratings starting looking like yours do now…and for the same reasons. Good news: I can send you to a few good reverse mortgage banks, if you’re looking to cash in on the Bullsh*t Mountain tower while you (and it) are still vertical. It’s not like you owe anything to your grandkids…you got yours when you wanted it, so screw them.
Hey…there’s your new commercial!
H/T: Politic USA