With the sadness of Reagan’s economic idiocy well exposed, Dubya Bush shuffled off into a corner not to be mentioned and Ted Cruz dumped by his own party, Glenn Beck and his friends are running a bit short of heroes. It’s seems no matter how far right they turn, these guys just can’t seem to find someone who doesn’t prove, sooner or later, to be an utter embarrassment. Fortunately, Beck and a few others have recently discovered that if you turn hard Right enough times, you’ll eventually end up going Left — and directly into John F. Kennedy. (Especially if you’re getting directions from a couple of billionaires who specialize in re-writing history.)
If this “Treason” flier looks in any way hauntingly familiar, it’s probably because you’ve seen it more recently, but with a black guy in the picture. In spite of this, the Great White Pigasus has somehow found a way to hijack JFK for the Koch Brothers, claiming that were he alive today, Kennedy would be a “Tea Party Radical.“ Because…frogs. Or something.
“So, who was John F. Kennedy? He’s been coopted by the left, but would he be? Would people like Orrin Hatch? Would people like Mitch McConnell even accept a man like John F. Kennedy today? You see, the left would say that he would be right there with the left today. Well, he might be. Because when you boil a frog as long as the water is tepid when he gets in, right? But if you do it slowly, do it slowly, he’ll be boiled. But if it’s hot, he’ll jump out. I contend that the water would be so hot right now that JFK, if you could bring him back. If you could bring back the politician that JFK was, he wouldn’t be accepted by the Republican Party because he would be a TEA PARTY RADICAL. He wouldn’t even recognize what this country has become, and I’m basing that on his words.”
Oh, yes…you heard it. If Harvard-educated John F. Kennedy were alive today, he’d be hanging around D.C. with tea bags hanging from his Uncle Sam hat. The guy who did his best to eviscerate price-fixers in the steel industry would have been in collusion with the Koch Brothers. The first president to publicly state that segregation was morally wrong would have been the front man for a movement that is near-as-makes-no-difference 100% white? This Catholic, the only non-protestant president in U.S. history, would be the radical mouthpiece for an organization that is overwhelmingly Protestant?
God, almighty…why would liberals today THINK that Kennedy’s passion for voting rights would in any way conflict with a religion (sorry, “party”) that stays in power exclusively by gerrymandering and suppressing minority votes? How DARE liberals claim Kennedy as one of their own? What would HE have to say about that?
“What do our opponents mean when they apply to us the label “Liberal?” If by “Liberal” they mean, as they want people to believe, someone who is soft in his policies abroad, who is against local government, and who is unconcerned with the taxpayer’s dollar, then the record of this party and its members demonstrate that we are not that kind of “Liberal.” But if by a “Liberal” they mean someone who looks ahead and not behind, someone who welcomes new ideas without rigid reactions, someone who cares about the welfare of the people — their health, their housing, their schools, their jobs, their civil rights, and their civil liberties — someone who believes we can break through the stalemate and suspicions that grip us in our policies abroad, if that is what they mean by a “Liberal,” then I’m proud to say I’m a “Liberal.”
Now, to be fair, Kennedy really was a mixed bag. He was described by contemporaries as being both an “idealist and a pragmatist,” and his political record reflects that. He was very much pro-life, possibly due in part to the fact that he defined himself largely through his Catholic faith. He also supported lowering the taxes of the time with the line “A rising tide lifts all ships.” He was also a lifetime member of the NRA, and a supporter of the second amendment.
But, let’s bear a few points in mind:
- He did support lowering taxes to help grow the economy, but the top 70% marginal tax rate he proposed was a wee bit higher than the “nothing” the Tea Party does.
- A lot of people were members of the NRA when it was about hunting, safety and conservatism — before it became a group of right-wing, militant psychotics.
- Getting shot in the head might have rearranged his mind a bit on the issue of gun control. And that was also in 1963; a mere 6 years later, total crime, violent crime and murder rates had nearly doubled.
- While Joseph McCarthy had been a family friend for many years, Kennedy drafted (but never had to deliver) a speech to censure McCarthy for his Red Scare witch hunts.
- His father, who he idolized, was good friends with Franklin D. Roosevelt, who he served under as ambassador to England.
So, sorry, Beck, Rush, Chris Wallace, Neil Cavuto, Breitbart and Jeff Jacoby — start combing the gutters for your own heroes. If John F. Kennedy was a “Radical Tea Partier,” then Barack HUSSEIN Obama is Abraham Lincoln.
Wait…there’s one more thing. What are we forgetting? Oh, THAT’S right:
- Remember the wanted poster at the top of the page? The one that looks just like the “Obamunist Wanted Posters” the Tea Party distributes today? That wasn’t so different from many similar fliers circulated by the John Birch Society, far-right Ayn Rand disciples and the loudest voices in the Anti-JFK propaganda movement.
- The Anti-JFK John Birch Society was co-founded and led by none other than…wait for it…FRED KOCH, father of today’s Tea-Funding KOCH BROTHERS!
So, guys, tell us again how much JFK would have supported the Tea Party.