Apparently, part of idiot culture is to modify one’s diesel truck so that it emits gigantic bursts of black smoke whenever that person revs his or her engine. These colossal morons call this “rollin’ coal,” and it’s quite possibly one of the most asinine things you have ever seen.
Self-described rednecks far and wide have adopted this assault on mother earth and our nostrils all across the nation, and gather to show off their pointless clouds of ebon smoke on Facebook, Tumblr, Instagram, and the like.
Robbie, a 25-year-old mechanic, told Vocativ that “Your truck is not just something to get you from point A to point B. It’s who you are.”
In other words, trucks belonging to people who do this are complete d*cks.
Those who subscribe to this subculture spend between $1,000 and $5,000 modifying their trucks, adding smoke stacks and switches (to trick the engine into thinking it needs more fuel) or even revamping the entire fuel system, just to cause an ozone killing tuft of smoke when they rev the engine.
And then there’s the power.
“If someone makes you mad, you can just roll coal, and it makes you feel better sometimes,” Ryan, a high school senior who works with Robbie, said. “The other day I did it to this kid who was driving a Mustang with his windows down, and it was awesome.”
Of course, it’s a great way to show those liberals what’s what, too!
“The feeling around here is that everyone who drives a small car is a liberal,” Ryan said. “I rolled coal on a Prius once just because they were tailing me.”
The environmental impact isn’t anything with which one should be concerned. Those sissy liberals at the Clean Air Taskforce say that diesel exhaust is one of the country’s greatest sources of toxic pollutants and leads to 21,000 premature deaths yearly, but you know how liberals lie, right?
Robbie knows that the impact isn’t too bad. “I’m not a scientist, but it couldn’t be too horrible,” Robbie said. “There are a lot of factories that are doing way worse than my truck.