HomeHumorBREAKING: Obama Takes Oath on Koran (Satire)

BREAKING: Obama Takes Oath on Koran (Satire)

While not reported by the “lamestream media” at large, reports are that Obama opted to swear his second Oath of Office on a Koran instead of a Bible. When asked about the decision, President Obama said, “I can’t believe you Americans get so worked up over religion! Where I’m from, nobody really cares about this stuff at all, and people keep their spirituality between their God and themselves. Besides, I can’t run for a third term (but I’m working on it!) so I might as well just be myself now. Next I’m coming after all you redneck crackers and your guns!” Obama then reportedly threw down the mic, kissed an unidentified white woman on the mouth, and disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

In this close up, you do not see the words “Holy Bible”. Also notice how Obama makes sure to get his Muslim ring directly on the book.

In his private swearing in, Obama added further insult by adding the mustache of Joseph Stalin to the Koran. Chief Justice Roberts was visibly shaken during the ceremony but was calmed by the gift baskets passed out to friends and family that included free birth control pills for everyone – A nod to his controversial Supreme Court decision to uphold Obamacare.

The Marxist Koran is currently #9 on Amazon's bestseller list.

The Marxist Koran is currently #9 on Amazon’s bestseller list.

As originally reported by Chest Strongwell.

Read more at Spiffysean.com

Sean Kemmerer is a freelance writer, administrator of Politics Without The Crazy Pills, can be followed @Walkofshameband, and thinks that with the DOW approaching its highest level in history that Obama is the worst Socialist ever.


Americans Against The Tea Party is a group committed to exposing the Tea Party’s lies, violence, racism, ignorance, intolerance, bigotry, and corporatist fascist efforts to subvert our democratic process – and we are organizing to defeat Tea Party/GOP candidates on ballots everywhere.
  • Suzanne Longo

    It’s called a sense of humor, folks.

  • Janet

    DELETE THIS! The teabaggers will strip off the satire references and pass this off as real. Obama does NOT need his supporters’ providing fodder for the imbeciles.

  • http://www.chickenunderwear.com Chicken Underwear

    They are all the same crap to me. It would be ok with me if it were true

  • Cat M.

    I liked the one I saw yesterday. Think of the three Moses religions as a movie trilogy. The Torah was the first one, and the New Testament was the sequal. Then the Koran came along and completely redid the New Testament. Jesus was no longer the main character and the Messiah still hasn’t shown up yet. Jews like the first one, but didn’t bother with the second two. Christians regard the first two as manadory to watch, but basically ignore the 3d one. Moslems, of course, think the third one was the best of the three, while the Mormons liked the second one so much they started writing fan fiction that had absolutely nothing to do with the contents of the second one at all!

    • Cat M.

      damn, ignore the typos…damn…

    • rv branham

      fan fiction? that is the tipping point by which you can tell anything’s past is sell-by date…

    • Colter

      haha you are a genius

  • Nancy

    Oh ok it’s a joke. Don’t scare me.

  • Nancy

    Have you all gone nuts? Or is this a joke. Anyone could see it was a bible.

  • Imsloan

    Oh, I see he wore the ring with Death to America inscribed on it in Arabic and Gaelic! How nice!

  • Byron

    Watch how many idiots will actually believe this crap. Who’s the first?

  • Byron

    Watch how many idiots will actually believe this.

  • BigBob

    Haha, you got me. I clicked on humor and then forgot that I clicked on it. So when I saw the headline I thought “no, what?” And then when I read the thing about Stalin, I just cracked up … It took only a few comments to realize where I was. This is the humor section people, why so grumpy? I agree with Ethan, who gives a crap. Most of the major religions are all the same in the end anyway. Made me laugh though.

  • tchatman

    Yeah I’m suprised by the rehtoric, seems quite bizzare to me. They just Phucking wit Obama, damn they doing a good job. I guess its to get all the whites rowled up….LMAO

    • Beth

      No, not “the whites.” Tea Party, yes, not “the whites.”


  • http://Howtosavetheworldon12-21-12 power

    God-Damn it!!! He promised me he would use Winnie-the-Pooh as the tome for his swearing in! Damn it, damn it God-Damn it!! Not only was I able to stop two teapartiers from getting pregnant after having unwanted, un protected sex, they both suddenly discovered than the sex wasn’t that bad after all come to think about it. They both embraced, kissed and went off to buy some His and His towels for the bathroom. They are roommates don’t you know. Okay and men, so the prenancy miracle was not so miraculous after all but i swear it would have worked if one of them had been a woman really.

  • Ethan Surbaugh

    I guess I couldn’t give a damn if the president swore oath on either or both books. It wouldn’t make a difference to me.

  • Spiffy Sean

    Who wastes their time reading and commenting on me making up this stuff for conservatives to make up?

    Oh, and thanks for reading! – SSS

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